If you are like me, you think a lot about the other paths. Those you turned down. The ones you were sure you didn’t want, and how happy you are not there right now. But also, about the ones you were in doubt, and whether you’d been happier if you had taken it.
I think I might just be having an overly emotional year. 2010 and 2011 brought some huge changes in my life. I’m thankful for them, the good and the bad. But it’s now starting to sink in. Some of it was just something fun, fresh and new, but now it really feels real. And I can’t help but question myself.
Deep down, I believe God protects me and that I am always where his will places me. But sometimes I just get carried away thinking about my ‘mistakes’. If there is such a thing as a ‘mistake’ in life. Maybe there isn’t.
I work with small children and am always amazed about how their problems are so little, but so big to them. Someone took my crayon. She won’t say she is sorry. He showed me his tongue. Grownups tend to dismiss them, but all you need to do is look at a three year old crying to see how much it hurt.
Maybe deep down we are all a bunch of three year olds running around. At least, I certainly feel like that from time to time. Sometimes I think ‘if only my biggest problem was having to share the play dough and tidying up the dress-up trunk’. My problems seem much bigger. But they are not. When I look at what was nagging at me two years ago…I simply cannot remember. So here is to living in the moment like a three year old, but being grown up enough to know that no matter what, its only small potatoes.