Thursday, October 25, 2012

31 days: On gentleness

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I am joining the Nester plus quite a few other bloggers in a 31 day writing challenge. You can write about whatever you want, and I choose to write on the search for a Spirit-led life. Join me, won't you?

To start reading from the beginning, and for links for all days, click here.

On gentleness
When upset over something, I've learned I have three basic modes of dealing with people:
I scream, and shout, and cry and guilt-trip them.
I keep my teeth gritted and tell myself to keep cool, while methodically pointing out flaws and coming up with alternatives ("its your choice, you do this, or I will do that)
I keep quiet and listen. Until I usually explode and resort to #1 or #2 above.
In the heat of the argument, it's not so easy for me to see how unproductive those options are. I just want to be right. And the fact that my husband often lets me win our arguments, I feel victorious. Until I just feel like crap.
So today I choose to focus on being gentle instead of being right. Even if only for today. Or for this hour. Or until something drives me crazy. But I'll keep the word in the back of my mind when I have to speak. The same way I tell little kids how to pet a dog: