Monday, October 29, 2012

31 days: On forgiveness

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I am joining the Nester plus quite a few other bloggers in a 31 day writing challenge. You can write about whatever you want, and I choose to write on the search for a Spirit-led life. Join me, won't you?

To start reading from the beginning, and for links for all days, click here.

On forgiveness

This past Saturday our church couples met for dinner. I cannot begin to tell you how much I simply love those. Something truly holy takes place. And this time, we felt it was brought up to a new level. Testimonies filled with sad events glorified God, and paved the way for better marriages.

The main idea was the sanctity of marriage, and how there is one simple way to get there: forgiveness. 

When I got married, I guess I was quite naive. I thought marriage was about making my husband happy. About being happy. This week I learned it's not. It's about forgiving. And just as important, it's about asking for forgiveness.

Nowadays we tend to say a half-hearted sorry when things go wrong. We don't stop. We don't acknowledge how we make others feel. How we feel. Why we are wrong. Or God forbid, let go of control to apologize. And the pride eats up, destroying marriages that don't even have something terribly wrong with them.

I witnessed a long marriage go down the drain. Until today, I cannot say why divorce happened. My guess, lack of sanctity. Of asking and offering forgiveness. On the big things and the little ones. Which sounds quite sad. And honestly, quite stupid.

So my husband and I started a new ritual. When we go to bed we talk about our day. We ask if there is anything we did to hurt each other. And then we ask forgiveness. And then we grant it. We've been doing this for two whole days, and guess what? Something came up every day. And my guess is that it will, for the rest of our lives. That's why we choose to do it.