Yesterday our pastor did not preach. Every so often we have guests, and this time we had the pleasure of listening to one of the elders in the church. I simple love him and his wife. They feel like grandparents to me. She gives me books, while he sneaks in sentences in English when he sees me. They just make me smile and think about what kind of person I'll be at their age (I just keep hoping I'll be as cool as them).
However, as much as I love him, he can be a tough cookie. The first time I heard him preach I though Phew, I'm glad he is not the one doing this every week. Don't get me wrong, he is good. But he knows that we often need to hear it like it is, and he is in a position to lecture us simple because he's been there.
So when he got up I immediately though Here we go. And then he began talking about boats.
He talked about how Simon Peter and his lot where all fishing, and Jesus calls them, and they leave everything to follow him. And then he paints a picture of what it must be like to try to follow Jesus on dry land while carrying the boat with you, because you are too afraid of giving that up.
His words couldn't have painted a more accurate picture. For months now I've been feeling overwhelmed (hence the blog slacking) and I couldn't quite describe it. Until he talked about the boats we drag with us, and that made total sense.
In my case, I think I carry a fleet. They are all named after my fears: financial troubles, having a baby, upsetting my husband, disappointing someone. And sometimes they get heavy. Too heavy.
So today I celebrate the acknowledgement of these boats. I'll try to break free from them, but I know they are quite crafty and will reattach before I notice.